Endless Obsession
by Still Forgotten
Summary: [Elricest]All they wanted to do was return their bodies and limbs, and as with everything in life, sacrifices must be made.But how can Ed continue to hide his feelings from the brother he continues to distance himself from to protect? EdAl


**A/N- hey guys! I just typed this up last night, cause I totally forgot where I was going with Crying to the Walls, and everyone wanted me to make that an elricest…so, here it is! I know it's nothing special, but try to bear with me, k? I'd love it if you would take the time to type me up a review… just so I know I'm not writing to empty space. Well, thanks then, and enjoy! The next chapters will be longer and hopefully more interesting then this, if anyone wants to read more…

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**Endless Obsession

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And it hurt…because loving Al like this was wrong. A taboo. A sin against nature. It was a silent promise Edward had made to himself to protect his brother; Al would never know…_could_ never know… of his dirty secret. Maybe if he buried it, held it hostage in his heart, time would build a wall around his wayward emotions, and maybe, _maybe_, Al would be none the wiser. And even though he convinced himself that it was only out of complete love for his younger sibling, a small part of Ed whispered the truth he denied... maybe he feared rejection…complete abandonment by the only family he had…

"Brother, it's raining again…" Armor. Three years his brother's soul had been encased in this unaging form, and three years of struggling to replace what they had lost had remained inflexible against the bonds of reality that tied them both down. They had gone through hell and back together countless times, and still, the younger boy spoke with the sweet innocence of a child. A child who has seen one too many horrors in life, perhaps, but a child none the less.

Ed sighed, more in frustration of the battle waged between mind and body than impatience with his brother's obvious remark. "It's always raining, Al." Then with a touch of ill concealed despair, "_Always._" But from the distant look in the teen's eyes, the weather was the farthest subject from his mind.

He couldn't sleep. It wasn't because his current state of being would not allow it, it was the usual uncomfortable silence, shattered not by the driving rain against the weak roof of the shabby inn, but by the second pained sob in the hour. Alphonse glanced at the bed on which whose occupant fought a futile battle against the thin covers and lost. A Sheer sheet of sweat ran down his brother's exposed torso, and for a moment, the temptation to wake the boy from his nightmare was overwhelming. Without knowing how he got there, in only seconds he was kneeling beside the bed, resisting the urge to hug his brother close to him…to fight away his personal demons…to lift the burden the seemed to be weighing heavily down on Edward these past few weeks.

A high keening noise spread from the sleeping figure's throat as thin trails of either sweat or tears trickled down his cheeks to disappear into the sloppy braid that supported only half the hair on his head, the rest falling strategically over his eyes and back.

Al's hand paused only centimeters above the form, and instantly recoiled into an uncertain fist. Ed had been furious the last time, and the only time, Al had tried to wake him from his nightmares. The embarrassment had been confused with anger, and Al had watched as his brother stormed off into the night, as he always had done when things became too hard to handle. It had been raining then, too.

Slowly, not wanting to startle his brother when he woke, the boy nudged the figure on the bed gently. Although he could not feel the warmth, or sense the softness of skin, he imagined what it would be like to be able to embrace the boy in front of him… to run _real_ fingers, _HUMAN_ fingers through long blond hair…

Ed turned over, still fast asleep, pushing his body closer to the hand that now rested on his human shoulder, black shirt now pressed high on his chest, exposing more of the skin of his stomach. The distressed frown that creased his features was replaced with confusion, as if lost in his own dreams…between the realms of nightmares and adventures.

Goaded by his reaction, the suit slowly rubbed lazy circles against the other's skin… softly… a low moan, and Al almost jumped back in surprise. Afraid that he had accidentally hurt his older sibling, he withdrew his metal arm, and a dismayed grimace stained the teen's features.

"…Brother?" But the boy didn't respond, and on impulse, Alphonse began moving his fingers up and down the sleeping individual's upper limbs.

He had never meant for it to go this far. His fingers traced every line, every muscle, every scar, and his gloved hand descended to reach under the boy's shirt… his _brother's_ shirt…

"…Al…"

The suit almost fell over in shock, words of apology spilling from his mouth before he had even regained balance.

"Ah, brother, look…see, I know you told me not to wake you….but…and…"

"…mmnnn…Al…" And once more, the blonde haired child turned over, still fast asleep, leaving his younger brother speechless on the floor, the horror of what he had done, what he _would_ have done flooding through his mind like a tsunami.

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**A/n- I know this didn't turn out that great, again, but please, if you liked it, hated it, want me to change something...whatever it is, I'd love some reviews! Flames and criticism welcomed and encouraged. :-)**


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